While living in Colorado, I recognized that folks wearing cowboy hats were as common a sight as mountains, twenty-one speed bicycles, Merrills, and Subarus. After all, the Centennial State was an influential part of the USA’s western heritage, a legacy that influenced me as well. Broad-brimmed hats became a routine part of my outdoor attire. One night, however, my wife and I were ready to go out to dinner, when I noticed something missing. After retrieving my Stetson, I noticed my wife’s question-mark expression. “Cowboy hairspray,” I said as I plopped the hat on my head. The moment the words left my mouth, I knew a poem would soon follow. This week’s blog features the result of that inspiration. Enjoy.

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COWBOY HAIRSPRAY

Down through the ages humans fussed with their hair

To enhance women’s beauty, make men debonair

Whether man or woman, oldster or teen

We’re all a tad vain about how we’re seen

We’ve buzz-cut hair short and let it grow long

Set it with curlers and bound it with thongs

Permed it and dyed it and slicked it with grease

Used conditioners to comb it pretty as you please

Applied tonics and Butch Wax and Extra-hold sprays

To paste it in place whether for work or for play

We’ve even gone caveman, done nothing at all

The Dreadlocks style, like a knotted, yarn ball

Yep, we’ve tried most everything, boy that’s a fact

Ideas for “Dos” we seldom have lacked

But then there’s the cowboy, whose life is the range

Hair stylin’ gimmicks, to him seem quite strange

His quaff is what it is, curly, straight, or gray

Washed with soap and water at the end of a day

Dried with a towel and then combed straight back

Or parted down the middle like a follicle crack

Don’t get me wrong, cowboys care how they look

It’s just they don’t need all the gobble-de-gook

That city-folk use to manage their hair

To capture a wave and give ’em some flair

If a cowboy sports tonic, it’s a special occasion

Like a wedding or funeral, or a female liaison

Other than that, it’s just water and comb

Or maybe his fingers dragged ’cross his dome

Yes-sir, my friends, it’s as simple as that

A cowboy’s hair spray is a wide-brimmed hat

It’ll keep his hair in place all day long

Whether ridin’ or ropin’ or singin’ a song

So, there you have it, at least my rendition

Of a hair stylin’ tool that’s a Western tradition

There’s Stetson, Bailey, Resistol and more

Pick your favorite brand, they’ll all do the chore

With one plopped on your head, bid stylin’ gunk farewell

A near life-time replacement for hair sprays and gels